Retreat Journal

An honest first-person account of day 1 at an Ayurvedic retreat in Kerala — arriving with addiction, anxiety and bad sleep, the intake consultation, Abhyanga, and why I'm really here.

First good night of sleep. Eight hours. My resting heart rate was 74. And then my digestive system staged a full revolt.

Day four. The doctor sat across from me this morning and said: you need to stop moving. Everything. You are Vata through and through and you have been running at a pace that has depleted your nervous system reserves.

3.5 hours of sleep, back pain gone, buttermilk treatment, and the unsettling realization that I need to lean in harder. Day 5 at the Ayurvedic retreat in Kerala.

1.5 hours of sleep, treatment refusal, a temple behind a bodega, and the anxiety of thinking about leaving. Day 6 at the Ayurvedic retreat in Kerala.

One week in. Five and a half hours of sleep. Watched the Spurs beat Oklahoma City. Eating only vegetables. The Virechana protocol begins tomorrow. Day 7 at the Ayurvedic retreat in Kerala.

Day 8 of the retreat. The Basti treatment, a steam box that looks like a guillotine, a meditation class where I slept deeply, and an unexpected conversation about marriage and family.